Love Wins, Part 1: What “Love Wins” Means

On June 26 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled in Obergefell v. Hodges, declaring that state-level bans on same-sex marriage are unconstitutional.

Image: Reuters/Charisma News

The decision sparked the trending slogan “Love Wins,” used by same-sex marriage supporters to celebrate victory for the ruling … and their disapproval of those who do not embrace same-sex marriage as constitutional.

“Love Wins.” Did it win in the ruling?

One Word for Different Kinds of Love

In English, just one word expresses love. The word is versatile.

“Love” can be used to communicate varying levels of emotion: intensity – as in a prospective groom proclaiming his love for his future bride – or casualness, as in “I love key lime pie!” or “I love my new boss.”

The word also communicates different kinds of love, as in the difference you experience in loving your Mustang and in loving your teenage child (even after he wrecks your Mustang.)

Four Words for Love

On the other hand, the ancient Greeks described their understanding of the concept of love much more thoroughly. Their language had at least four different words for “love.”

Eros: sexual love, referring to carnal impulses. The word’s root means to ask or demand, confirming that eros is not a giving type of love but one that is self-seeking.
Stergo: love within a family, as in a parent and child. Stergo implies devotion.
Phileo: love between friends, based on mutual satisfaction.
Agape: love of God for man which draws love out of man for God. Agape is considered to be the highest form of love, offered sacrificially with no limits and expecting nothing in return.

The different words for love were used intentionally in scripture’s original Greek.

Now when you hear the cry, “Love Wins,” you have a broader understanding of love and you can consider for yourself the kind of love referenced in the slogan.

What “Love Wins” Means

In the 2015 same-sex marriage ruling, those who proclaimed “Love Wins” were right.

Supporters believed that an individual’s passions should be given freedom, seeking to satisfy the self and its desires. That is the kind of love that won – love in eros form. It’s a “what’s-in-it-for-me” love. When same-sex marriage supporters proclaim, “Love Wins,” what they truly indicate is that “my kind of love wins.”

Interestingly, eros does not appear in the New Testament. The other three types of love – stergo, phileo, and agape – do.

While eros signifies a love that is centered on self, the other three terms indicate a type of love for another, with agape the most selfless of them all.

The challenge you face in today’s culture is not a challenge to the statement that “Love Wins.” There is no question that it does.

Rather, the challenge is this: what kind of love wins … a selfish love or a selfless love?